January 12, 2012

:: resolve to be bolder ::

i'd love to say i'm resolving to blog more frequently (notably not the same as "more often"), but that would be a lie. i hope to do so, but i'm not resolving to do so. because i'm nothing if not realistic. nor do i care for "new year's resolutions." i've never quite "gotten" the whole new year's hoopla. don't know why, but it just doesn't excite me as much as it seems to everyone else. in fact, each time i type "happy new year" to someone in an email, i feel like a bit of a fraud. not because i don't truly wish that the new year is a happy one for the person, but because i wouldn't normally write that sentiment to someone, if i didn't just feel like it was what i'm supposed to be doing/saying.

so, yeah. i don't really do the new year's resolution thing. but this year might be a little different. i had a thought during church on sunday. the sermon was partly about our lives this year, if the world truly was to end on december 21, 2012. it made me think. i'm not one to have those "if i died today, what would i regret having done or not done" thoughts. if i died today, i'd be dead and in a place with no regrets. i'm just not one to think, "if i had 24 hours left to live, what would i do?" (yes, i would like to travel more. and i hope i will. but i know that when i die, i will not lament the places i did not go. because i will be in a far more glorious place.)

but here's the thing. i want that (eternal) peace for those i know and love (and even for those i don't know). if i happen to be sitting around on december 20 and the world is to end the next day i would want to look back over the year and know that something i said or did (or perhaps didn't say/do) or even that the way i lived my life helped someone know the Truth. to know the peace that surpasses all understanding.

so i resolve to be more intentional (notably not the same as "pushy") and say and/or do something that could be a light to someone each and every day. seems simple. seems like something i should already be doing. and perhaps for the most part i am/do. but i don't want to rely on "pretty much already doing." i want to be bolder than that.

No comments:

Post a Comment